When the One You Help is… You
You know when you’re on the toilet and there’s just three sheets of TP left?
It’s enough for what you need, thank goodness, but as soon as you wash your hands and walk through the bathroom door, the imminent danger is forgotten.
(You did wash your hands, right?)
The problem is, when you were the only one who noticed the threat, you were also the only one who could offer up the cure. Or at least in sufficient time.
It’s like one of those Jack Ryan novels where the fate of the… okay, well… household… is in your hands.
So please, oh please, oh please, just go straight to the place where the extra TP is stored, then CHANGE THE FREAKIN’ ROLL!
You might be wondering right now, “Gee, what inspired this blog post?”
It’s not what you think.
Do you remember last week’s missive about how I wake up every morning and tell myself, “This is a really good day?” And how that actually self-creates the thing it’s suggesting?
Well, because I write this message on Saturday and schedule it to reach you on Sunday mornings at oh-God hundred a.m. (because if you know me at all, ya know I ain’t awake yet), more than half the time, the lesson or moral of the tale has already vanished from my mind.
Last Sunday morning I’d awoken from a nightmare of epic proportion. Seems I’d married my high school sweetheart, and he was stepping out on me with a parade of other people… including every gay man I’ve ever converted.
When I sat down to skim my email, and came across the chirpy little voice suggesting “This is a really good day,” I actually flipped off my phone. No, I don’t mean I turned it off or shut it down. I mean I gave it the middle finger.
“What right does this little hussy have to lecture me about whether this will or will not be a lousy day?”
And then I took a breath. I scrolled back to the beginning of the message. Then I made sure there was enough toilet paper for the mission, before sitting down to contemplate its greater meaning.
Ya know what? Just those six little words were enough to stop me from spending several hours spiraling in high school hell. I mean, it’s not like my self-respecting homosexual friends would waste the time of day on that schmuck anyhow. So why should I?
Today my dream for you is this… whatever thing you’ve been noticing occasionally that needs to be done (maybe it’s changing a light bulb, or popping some Vitamin C to stay healthy, or unplugging from a toxic co-worker or friend), then for heaven’s sake, DO IT.
Be the change your world needs. Be the powerful influence for good that I know you can be. Be your best and brightest self… because you deserve more than just the crusty turds left over after you take care of everyone else.
(Hmm… maybe I’m still dwelling on that TP thing.)
P.S. If writing a book is one of your annoying “somedays,” please, please, PLEASE take half an hour for yourself today to write something. Even if all you do is reach out to me or a friend to hold you accountable, you’ll be glad you took that step toward the best version of yourself… one in which you’re not your own last priority.